


working title

by mrbuttersworthless (orphan_account)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Post-Sburb/Sgrub, Romance, Short Chapters, Slow Burn, Slow Updates, mostly domestic fluff, will have future smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:47:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25500856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/mrbuttersworthless
Summary: Literally just Karkat moves in with Dave, gay antics ensue. Mostly dumb shit, will probably eventually have a complete tonal shift and get way too serious. Just to keep things interesting.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
Kudos: 11





	working title

Dave couldn’t help himself from being nervous. Usually calm and collected, the pit in his stomach was quite off-putting. He turned the sink on and splashed cold water in his face, drying his hands off on an old, shitty towel.

Even though he and Karkat had to deal with each other for three years on the meteor, something about the troll coming to live with him felt... different. Earth C was lovely, but something in him felt empty now that he was living on his own, with Jade stopping to by to visit every once in a while of course. And yeah, Dave would go out to see John, Rose, and Roxy too, but he still felt a hollowness whenever he went home. Dave heard a knock at the door and felt his heart pick up a little. He hated that.

Karkat: DAVE OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!   


Sigh. This already felt like a mistake. Dave walked out of the bathroom and opened the door.

Dave: why didnt you just open it yourself it doesnt even have a lock   
Karkat: WHY DON’T YOU LICK MY FUCKING BULGE?   


Dave looked over to the single box sitting next to Karkat.

Dave: hope you brought some aspirin   
Dave: roomie   
Karkat: IS THAT ONE OF YOUR HUMAN DRUGS FOR YOUR INFERIOR THINK PANS?   
Dave: yes   


Karkat rolled his eyes.

Dave: wait do trolls not get headaches   
Karkat: I’M ALREADY GETTING ONE DUMPASS.   
Dave: yeah same dude did you bring any or not   
Karkat: YES.   
Dave: hell yeah   


Karkat walked in with the box and set it on a glass coffee table. Dave got glimpse of the contents of the box. An extra turtleneck and pair of leggings, a few pairs of underwear, a laptop, old sticky notes and of course, the aspirin. Karkat walked right into the kitchen area and filled two glasses with tap water. Dave had already dry swallowed four pills.

Karkat: I GOT WATER —   
Karkat: DAVE WHAT THE FUCK, THAT WAS PROBABLY WAY TOO MANY.   
Dave: its fine man i always do this much   
Karkat: OKAY, BUT WHEN’S THE LAST TIME YOU DRANK WATER. YOU LOOK MORE LIKE SHIT THAN USUAL.   
Dave: thanks and idk maybe a week ago   


Karkat stared at him in annoyance and maybe a little bit of concern. He set the waters down on the table and washed down a pill.

Karkat: DRINK SOME WATER.   
Dave: nah   
Karkat: STOP ACTING LIKE A WRIGGLER AND DRINK SOME FUCKING WATER.   
Dave: don’t think i will   
Karkat: JUST DRINK THE FUCKING WATER ASGJSGDGH   
Dave: no   
Karkat: DRINK IT YOU IMMATURE ASSWHIPE. I GOT YOU WATER SO YOU WOULDN’T DIE AND I DON’T WANT TO FIND A NEW PLACE TO LIVE.   
Dave: chill dude im not gonna die   
Dave: i drink apple juice like everyday   
Dave: sure my piss is sunshine golden yellow but a little kidney failure never hurt anyone   
Karkat: I’M JUST GOING TO IGNORE WHAT YOU SAID THERE.   
Karkat: WHERE DO I PUT MY SHIT.   
Dave: theres a dresser over there   


Dave pointed at the small mahogany dresser sat next to a window. There was a dying potted plant on it, some sort of little cactus.

Dave: you can move the cactus if you want   


Karkat walked over and clumsily put all of his things in the top drawer. He didn’t even bother keeping his clothes folded.

Karkat: WHY THE FUCK IS THIS DEAD EARTH PLANT HERE?   
Dave: idk jade gave it to me   
Dave: you can throw it out i dont think its coming back   
Karkat: WHEN’S THE LAST TIME YOU WATERED THIS?   
Dave: a month maybe   
Dave: idk could be longer   


Karkat took Dave’s water off the table and dumped it on the plant.

Dave: dude that was my water   
Karkat: WERE YOU EVEN GONNA DRINK IT?   
Dave: no   
Dave: its the principle of it   
Dave: you cant just take my shit   
Dave: how do i know youre not gonna take my money now   
Dave: gonna steal my heart man   
Karkat: YOU’RE SO FUCKING ANNOYING.   
Dave: thanks   


Karkat walked over to the couch and collapsed on it, groaning.

Dave: how are you tired   
Dave: its 4 in the afternoon   
Dave: you carried a single box   
Dave: karkat   


Karkat was asleep.

* * *

Dave: yo wake up i made food   


Karkat groaned in response as Dave nudged him.

Dave: karkat   
Dave: karkat   
Dave: kar   
Dave: kitkat   
Karkat: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT.   
Dave: i made some grub   
Karkat: YOU MADE WHAT NOW?   


Karkat shot up and rubbed his eyes. Dave definitely knew that grub referred to troll babies, but said it anyway because he thought it’d be funny.

Dave: food   
Karkat: PLEASE DON’T TELL ME YOU SOMEHOW HAVE ACCESS TO GRUBS AND COOK AND EAT THEM. PLEASE.   
Dave: ok   


Dave walked into the kitchen and pulled a came back with two plates of pizza and two glasses of red kool-aid.

Dave: no troll babies sorry   


Dave sat down on the couch next to Karkat and set the food on the table, the scraping sound of porcelain on glass making the troll wince. Karkat tentatively grabbed the slice and inspected it.

Dave: dont tell me you didnt have pizza on alternia   
Karkat: NO DAVE, AS A MATTER OF FACT YOUR "PEET-SAW" DID NOT EXIST ON ALTERNIA.   
Dave: dude just eat it   
Dave: i promise im not gonna poison you   
Dave: thatd be very out of character for me   
Dave: critics would never let me live it down   
Dave: audiences would shun me   
Dave: thousand of people would make twitter threads of how badly i was written   
Karkat: IF I EAT THIS WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?   
Dave: yes   


Karkat took a bite, being extremely over-dramatic in the process. He chewed for an uncomfortable amount of time and somehow managed to swallow it loudly.

Dave: you done   
Karkat: SHUT UP.   


Karkat took another bite, without the theatrics this time.

Karkat: IT’S FINE.   
Dave: wheres my thank you   
Karkat: GO FUCK YOURSELF.   
Dave: youre welcome   


Dave turned on the TV and immediately regretted it. As per usual, it was Jake English’s fat, juicy ass

Dave: why is jakes fat juicy ass always on the tv   
Dave: is earth c really that boring   
Karkat: YES.   
Karkat: ALSO, PLEASE NEVER FUCKING SPEAK AGAIN.   
Dave: what im right   
Dave: mans has a fat ass   
Dave: are you jealous   
Karkat: FUCK NO. WHY WOULD I BE JEALOUS OF THAT.   


Karkat gestured vaguely to the TV screen. Dave could see past his facade

Dave: its okay you can admit youre insecure   
Dave: your ass is also pretty fat   
Dave: like on a cake scale from cake pop to rich people wedding cake   
Dave: you’re a very well made double decker   
Dave: triple in the right lighting   
Karkat: CAN WE PLEASE STOP COMPARING MY ASS TO FOOD.   
Dave: why   
Dave: dont be ashamed man   
Dave: your ass is   
Karkat: THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO SAY NEXT.   
Karkat: NOW THINK ABOUT HOW LIKELY WHATEVER YOU SAY WILL MAKE ME BREAK YOUR TV.   
Dave: scrumptious   
Dave: your ass is scrumptious   
Dave: dont bother breaking the tv were both obscenely rich remember   


Karkat made a pained screaming sound.

Karkat: FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.   
Karkat: DON’T YOU DARE MAKE A SEX JOKE OR I WILL PUNCH YOU.   
Karkat: I WANT TO SLEEP NOW   


Karkat stood up from the couch and moved to a corner of the room to stare at the wall angrily. Dave went out of his way to get a small house, so Karkat would sleep on a pull out couch. He didn’t really know why, but the idea of buying some giant mansion (even though he could definitely buy the entirety of Earth C multiple times) made him feel weird. He got a little one bed, two bath house instead. He kind of felt guilty now that Karkat would have to sleep on a pull out couch, but the troll had assured him it’d be fine. Although that could’ve just been so Dave didn’t try to convince him to sleep in his bed with him.

Dave: done 

The coffee table, along with its leftover plates and unfinished drinks, had been moved way to the side. If you were walking in the dark to say, take a piss, you would almost definitely hit your leg and fall, possibly shattering the glass in the process. Luckily, Dave always woke up at around noon, and Karkat could see in the dark. The “bed” itself had a SBaHJ sheet, pillow, and blanket thrown on top of it. You can’t really get recuperacoons on Earth C so Dave really hoped that this would somehow work out.

Karkat walked back to the pullout couch, and without words, folded it back up.

Dave: dude   
Dave: now youre just being petty   


Karkat didn’t reply and instead lied down on the floor and grumbled something vaguely resembling a _goodnight_. Dave took the plates and cups off of the coffee table and put them in the sink. He turned off the TV (which still had Jake’s ass on it) and the light before passing a quick glance towards a somehow already sleeping Karkat. He watched as his sides gently rose and fall, and while it was still unmistakably Karkat, it was kind of funny how peaceful he looked.

Dave: goodnight   



End file.
